My Home Depot Experience

Be warned, this is a rant.

Yesterday I went into my local Home Depot to price out some stainless steel sheets (for the project I mention in A Note About Spices) and it went about the same as every other visit there has gone.

A little something like this:

I walk into the HD to see 2 employees near the entrance busily talking about their day. I walk on, trying to find the item I need. I can't find it so I try to find an employee to assist me. Mind you, I've seen about 10 employees wandering around at this point. When I actively try to find an employee, somehow they sense my need and become impossible to pin down. I walk up on a herd of about 5, all of whom studiously do not make eye contact with me, and they scatter like cockroaches as I come within "Excuse me..." distance (about 15ft). If I'm lucky, which is rarely, I catch the slowest and weakest of the bunch and forcibly enlist their help by stepping squarely in their path and issuing the louder version of the "Excuse me.." call.

If I'm not lucky, which is usually, I've got to employ the "spot and stalk" tactic which involves spotting an employee at the end of another aisle and then stalking them as they walk quickly away and pretend they haven't noticed my existence.

Oh yes you have, you prairie dogging aisle ducking sonofa$#%@! 

(I don't cuss a lot, only when I'm irritated or mad or talking)

When I catch the mythical white buffalo, er, HD employee, it INVARIABLY goes like this...

ME:     "Excuse me, could you tell me where I could find the <whatever>?"

HD:     "well I don't know.. <mumblemumble> *shifting feet*.. maybe down... <mumblemumble>"

and then they start walking away!!!

WTF?? I never know if I'm supposed to follow them.. so I do anyway because I've got nothing to lose and I'd like to see more of this creature's habitat. I follow the HD employee as they randomly zig here and zag there, all the while muttering to themselves

and I have no idea why I've bothered following them!!!but I keep following until they stop and mutter halfway intelligibly "..maybe Frank might know..." but they just stand there

as if I know who the hell Frank is!!!

How in the %$*&# would I know who Frank is, much less where Frank could be located???!!!

GRAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!I end up tossing out an "uh, okay, thanks anyway I guess" and just walk away. I can't help but glare at the multiple small herds of employees I run into as I huffily walk out the door.

Yesterday I saw no less than 4 other customers needing assistance and not getting help from an employee, and 3 packs of employees scattering and collecting.. scattering and collecting... like schools of fish.

On my way out of the store yesterday I was SO MAD
that when an employee asked,

     "How are you today?"

I said, "FINE. I hate this store." and walked out.

I still have no idea if they carry stainless steel sheets and I don't give a $%&#!