Can I Bob's Red Mill in a Crock Pot?

I bought a few packages of Bob's Red Mill products that said "gluten free" for my best friend for her birthday. She has fibromyalgia AND a few allergies, one of them being legumes. I didn't remember the legumes until after I bought them and 3 of them (all purpose baking flour, bread mix, biscuit mix) were made with garbanzo bean flour. ARGH! So I gave her the brownie mix and corn bread mix (laaaaamest present ever!). I thought about making the brownies and bringing them to her but that would make me feel like, "you may not want to eat a brownie right now but you have to because I made them and here they are, already made, so eat. Now." I know that's probably not how it would have gone down but I think if you make something, the person is pretty much obligated to try it right then and there and maybe she didn't feel like a brownie. I do not want to be a brownie pusher. "Hey man... Psssst... hey.. I'll sell you a dime-bag of brownies for a dollar, man!" You know, like that.

I hadn't crocked anything in a few days and was feeling the itch when I got home last night (I can quit any time, I tell ya!) And here were these three little bags of Bob's Red Mill just a-staring at me with their soulful little cellophanes practically BEGGING me to make one. I chose the bread and figured, well, I'm not going to lose anything if it doesn't work out.

Did you read my Honey Wheat Bread post? If you did or when you do, you'll know that I realize I need a stand mixer. Baaaaad. I wasn't going to make another dough until I got one because a hand mixer just isn't good for dough. I KNOW this. I was aware of this going into the Bob's Red Mill Bread Mix.

*sigh*

And I did it anyway.

I rinsed my crock under hot water because I don't want a cold crock near anything that's going to have yeast in it. I then greased it very well and remembering how hard it was to get the Honey Wheat Bread out, this time after I greased (with Crisco as always) I floured it. I threw a handful of all purpose flour in it, rolled it around and coated the inside. Then I opened my kitchen window and dumped it out (the flour, not the crock, although I have lost quite a few things through the window this way and my loving husband usually retrieves it for me. Anything to keep the good food coming his way!) into my garden. I love having my garden right outside the kitchen and I love the cycle of food into compost into garden into food! Our animals know that special spot and between the dogs, cats, rabbits and chickens, whatever we dump gets used and the rest spread into the garden. Do you have random lumps, hills, or mountains of soil, compost, animal bedding or rabbit poo? Get yourself some chickens! They do a wonderful job of spreading piles out completely flat! Chickens is where its at!

I took the little packet of yeast out of the mix, microwaved my bowl for 10 seconds to warm it up, poured in the milk, added yeast and covered it with a paper towel. I let that sit to foam for 5 minutes and went to put together the rest of the ingredients.

Not everything goes smoothly, I don't know everything, sometimes I can be a bit ditzy... I read, "1 whole egg plus enough egg whites to make 3/4 of a cup." Okaaaaaay... did that mean I put the whole egg in the measuring cup AND THEN add egg whites into the cup until it hit the 3/4 mark? Or did I add 1 whole egg to the bowl and then fill a measuring cup to the 3/4 mark with egg whites? I still don't know the answer to that.

My chickens have had a cold (one of them was sneezing & wheezing) and are currently on antibiotics so I'm running a bit low on eggs at the moment and I decided to see how far the whites of my remaining eggs would get me before I decided where to put the whole egg. I started separating eggs into the measuring cup (yolk out the window) and it barely registered so I panicked and the last 4 eggs I had went in whole and I ended up dumping 3/4 C total of eggs into the mix, not 1 whole egg plus 3/4. I added the mix and the  apple cider vinegar it called for and got out my trusty hand mixer. There was dried Honey Wheat Bread dough stuck up inside and I knocked as much loose as I could. I girded my loins and prepared to flick the switch, not knowing if it would work (quite a lot of dough had gotten in there) or if it would smoke or maybe shoot flames... and I turned it on (picture me holding it an arms length away).

Quite disappointing that nothing spectacular happened other than  the whir of the beaters rotating. I dipped it into the dough oh-so-gingerly, spatula in my left hand to beat back any encroaching dough, and started mixing. A little less than a minute of the 3 required minutes in, my mixer started bogging down. I started furiously scraping it away from the mixer itself (it kept rising on the beaters) and it got away from me and into the housing. Again. And all over a good portion of my kitchen because I freaked and pulled it out of the bowl.

Sh*#%$!!

I mixed it as well as I could with the spatula and plopped it into the crock pot. It had a lot of peaks and wasn't settling down and (let me repeat) I know nothing about dough so I figured OH WELL. Its going to do what it'll do. I set the warmer on high, timer for 3 hours.

It rose so much that I had to put a heavy pan on top of the crock's lid to keep it down! It looked like brains, though, and not a smooth fluffy bread. It looked sort of like a giant dumpling.

I let it cook for about 2 1/2 hours, took the crock out of the warmer and let that sit for another 1/2 hour. Thanks to my genius idea of flouring the crock, it came out easily and onto a plate. I let it cool for another 10 minutes and carefully sliced it with a bread knife (it is important to use a bread knife on bread -it won't smash it) and buttered a slice. It was... okay. I think it will make okay toast but I haven't tried it yet. I know it would have turned out better had I been able to mix it properly but instead I ended up with a hideous chud of a loaf of bread.

Can I Bob's Red Mill in a crock pot?

I'm going to say... no. Not really. Not yet.

UPDATE 12/05/11:    No! It was most definitely NOT good as toast. My husband really loved it with the Incredibly Edible Elk Stew (recipe to come at some point) and tried getting me to taste it that way. Luckily for him, he was able to duck my flying fork. *shudder*